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WASHINGTON, D.C.-- Defense Secretary Leon Panetta called
for an investigation into recently-released images that appear to
show US Marines using dead Taliban as urinals. "This is a
disgrace," said Panetta at a press conference. "This is a major
yellowstain on the reputation of our Marines."
The images sparked outrage in Afghanistan, as the posthumous
act of urination puts the souls of the corpses in jeopardy of not
receiving 72 virgins in the afterlife. "This is horrifying", said
Addis Abdullah, an Islamic scholar in Kabul, Afghanistan. "The
Koran teaches that just one drop of urine can condemn martyrs
killed in holy war to an eternal afterlife of unimaginable
suffering and misery."
Sources inside the Pentagon suggest there could be severe
repercussions for the leaders of the unit who conducted the
urination. Said a top Marine officer who spoke on condition of
anonymity, "the commander of those relieving themselves could
be relieved of command."
The Naval Political Correctness Investigative Service (NPCIS)
has been assigned by Secretary Panetta to probe the matter,
which may increase in scope depending upon what investigators
find. Jeremy Waters, an investigator with NPCIS, said that close
inspection of the video by technicians revealed other
irregularities. "Some of the soldiers appear to be going
commando" said Waters. "That is clearly a violation of the
Marine uniform dress code."
